Words are timeless.

Words can make a grown man cry and a cold woman laugh.

Words are intimate.

The written word has the power to sway decisions, to entertain and to convince people of things they’d never believe otherwise.

Words change us.

Writers are among the most revered and influential figures in history, the works of Marx and Hitler sent millions into uproar, while Gandhi and the Dalai Lama convinced countless others to adopt a tranquil life.

Writers seduce the mind.

With the power of the written word at your disposal, a certain responsibility is implied, something like an obligation. One cliché comes especially to mind, “Use your powers to do only good.” To many this may seem ridiculous, and blown grossly out of proportion, but the words don’t have to be taken for their traditional meanings. Writer’s have the responsibility to be compelling, to write from the soul, to write what’s unthinkable, unexpected, controversial, even immoral. The day literature becomes predictable, two-dimensional and stale, is the day the writer has failed his audience, and his one fundamental responsibility.

Dull writing is a sin.

For me, writing was an acquired affection, but has left an incessantly savory taste in me that I could never live without. For many, writing proves to be a way to vent, to get their feelings off their chests and really unwind. I’ve never felt this way. Writing provides me with a challenge, the challenge to fill a page with something beautiful, something to be appreciated and admired. Writing should never be taken lightly, careful consideration should go into every word, nothing should go without intentional meaning.

Writing has purpose.

The difference between someone who writes for fun and a writer is in their way of life. The path of writing is continuous, there should be no end, if you find one, you’ve taken a wrong turn. The writer chooses to follow this path. Writing should be a way of life, a way of thinking. Everyday I look for things to write about: things that intrigue me, make me feel, about people with passion, people with hope and people in despair. The writer is overtly perceptive, and he feels the need to share life with others.

Words have intent.

Human compassion is what makes us vulnerable to the written word. A sense of empathy is what gives a writer the ability to feel and, in turn, give emotion. The art of sewing a world with ink is something that should be celebrated. For as long as we live, we will never see a day without a story, without a storyteller, and without a glimpse into the simple life.

Words inspire living.

Ewe awl ned too cheque hour spilling fir miss takes, bit ewe area hippy hat ewe half a spill chequer.

When it comes to writing things it is important to always keep an eye on the way you are spelling things. One good way to do this is to use a spell checker. What could be simpler than pressing a button to check that you have spelt everything correctly? But there is a problem with most spell checkers, they only check the spelling of each individual word, so what you have written may be a word spelt right but it is the wrong word entirely. It could be the case of an extra letter in a word, or maybe a letter missing. Perhaps it is just that while typing you may accidentally have hit the wrong letter. Shame that a spell checker will not have picked up on it.

Ok why don’t we have a look at the second sentence of the above paragraph;

And one good way to do this is to use a spell checker.

That makes complete sense, but does the following?

Any won hood weigh too do thin is two used spill chequer.

Of course that makes no sense at all, it seems to be random words thrown together to make some kind of gibberish. If you directly compare it to the original sentence you can see what has happened.

With the words (one), (way), (to) and (checker) you can easily see how in the second sentence they have changed to words that still sound the same but mean something entirely different causing the sentence to make less sense. Your spell checker would not pick up on these wrong spellings as the words are not spelled wrong at all, they are just the wrong words for what you are trying to say.

With the words (and), (good), (this) and (spell) you will find how in the second sentence they have had a change of letter which leaves them redundant for what you are trying to write but a spell checker will not highlight them as such.

With the word (use) it has changed tense to past tense. Again a spell check would not pick up on this.

Oh and one last thing, what happened between (use) and (spell)? The word (a) seems to have disappeared completely. Always be careful about such things, not typing a small word can have disastrous effects.

Ok the example of the above sentence is a bit extreme and if ever anyone wrote that second sentence (the wrong one) when they were meaning to write the first one (the correct one) then maybe writing would not be for them. But, even the best writers make mistakes, it is easy enough to do. Those mistakes may not be picked up by a spell check, so what can you do?

By all means use a spell check on your writing it is what it is there for. But, never rely on it wholly. If you want to make sure what you have typed is what you wanted to type read it for yourself. Better yet, print it out and read it and use a pen or pencil to highlight any words that are wrong. Or, even better, get someone else to check it for you. It can be hard to spot mistakes that you have made yourself but others may find them easily.

Even if you find yourself making many mistakes in your writing do not despair as practice really does make perfect. With practice, not only will spelling get better but you will also find your writing improves too and that is the really important thing.

Practice is really one of the truest forms of becoming a master in whatever people choose to become experts on.  I personally have always dreamed of writing. Somehow, writing allows me to express myself in better ways than using the verbal communication method.

I am shy. I have always been a quiet introvert. But blank pages are like magnets to self expression. As soon as I look at a blank page, a desire takes over me to fill in the white emptiness with something.  Anything. The problem is, many times shyness is more powerful. I start to doubt I will ever write anything meaningful.  Then, I remember what I’ve read from the masters: don’t think, just go ahead and write, no matter what it is. This stimulates imagination. And as with people who can speak flawlessly, it will just start coming and more and more things will be discovered.

Thank goodness for whoever had the brilliant idea of inventing language, specially written language. It’s true that human contact and talking to another human being in person is always well… more human. But I think that once all those ideas are written down, they are immortalized. While it’s good to tell a story to another person, maybe a group or a crowd, it is way better to be able to share it with hundreds, thousands, or maybe even millions of people. That is something extraordinary.

To introduce today’s topic then: could it be that the seemingly innocent typos we are all capable of making conceal deeper, more disturbing, meanings? …It could, and on this rather weak premise I set forth….

Please view with great care the results of over a thousand hours of research* into this fascinating field, displayed in full below as a list of the typos I came across and my favourite interpretations of them.

 

Exhibit A: “All the beast,”

How does this happen and what does it mean? To the first part of the question a flavourless answer for those in denial is thankfully available: the mashing together of the ‘a’ and ‘s’ keys with something less than the typing finesse we all learned at school is responsible, a too hurried ending to an email (highlighting that a careless final touch to a masterpiece can ruin it). In truth this answer is nothing more than a pathetic cop-out, and my extensive researches have revealed that this typo happens not through some lack of control and slip of the fingers, or knuckles (if you are an advanced typist, like me), but that it is a deliberate error (if errors can still be considered errors when they are deliberate?).

I am forced to recognise two possibilities: 1) a crass insinuation and 2) a half-hearted Neanderthal compliment.

Crass insinuation coupled with “the beast” is self explanatory, and a more penetrating analysis becomes unnecessary! 

Let us focus on the ‘Neanderthal compliment’ aspect then: should a cave man offer you “all the beast” then this would be the highest honour, only the most respected could earn such a feast! Quite coincidentally, this would be similar to saying the more familiar “all the best”.  It is a strange choice of compliment to use in the present day though… I would check the date the email was sent if I were you!

Exhibit B: “Got to ruin, so see you soon…”

There is only one possible interpretation of this! Despite the idyllic nature of our surroundings, vandals are loose in our midst (though I use the term carelessly, so please note that in this case “vandal” is not restricted to applying only to that East Germanic tribe of early AD which would, quite frankly, be ridiculous… we would all notice them!).

But did you ever wonder why the coffee machine requires such regular maintenance? Why the air conditioning would better suit an emperor penguin than a human? Why Word insists on helping you write a letter, even when you’re not? Now you know… those who seem pressed for time and end their emails in this way are truly busier than we might think; busy breaking things!   

Exhibit C: “[Name] contracted me earlier about…”

Is this really a mistake? Or does the sender truly consider themselves to be a disease? In order to fully understand the import of this it would be necessary to hear more; does this person liken themselves to a common cold, or perhaps something more exotic? –the “contracted” would necessarily imply something contagious and so we must step away from all those fascinating phobias, alas. Still, perhaps such detail is not needed after all, and this typo may merely suggest that the sender is admitting to being nothing more than a plague, a terrible inconvenience and [Name] was unfortunate enough to be the one inconvenienced; in this light it could almost be an apology… or at the very least an admission of guilt!

Exhibit D: “Hell [Name],”

Sometimes it is the omission of a letter, in this case the ‘o’, which leads us astray. Symbolic perhaps: chipping away at lies will uncover the truth in much the same way as meaning is revealed when the deceiving letters are discarded. Clearly this kind of ‘error’ signifies a deep frustration towards the recipient. In fact, it is but a small step to imagining the typing being done with emphatic hammer-like strikes of the forefingers and an expression of nearly perfect hatred distorting the face.

Personally, I would be wary in replying to an email opening with this sort of manic rage.

Exhibit E: “Tanks a lot,” or “Many tanks,”

No less than a declaration of war. Beware conflict disguised as appreciation; there is no genuine gratitude here!

Do not naively accept this sentence as a mistake; the sender quite clearly intends to send an army against you.

(Note: in the cases where a message opens with Exhibit D and closes with Exhibit E, it is advisable to apply for some sort of police protection, as at this point matters have clearly deteriorated beyond repair).

 

Alas, this is all there is time for today… but do not despair, the full edition (containing the previously unseen Exhibit F) will be released sometime in May 2048, about the time the engineering works are completed on our national rail network actually.

(I have checked this document carefully for typos of my own, and discovered none! So if you do uncover any, feel free to interpret them as you like…)

 

*the possibility that time is cyclical allows me to make this outrageous statement, similar to saying, I suppose, that Carlisle is East of Newcastle; which is entirely true… thus one minute could be said to be “over a thousand hours” if viewed in this way (admittedly, it is a bit of a stretch…).

Of the 18, two are “action less” varieties and the balance 16 are “action based” types. What exactly do these phrases mean? You would see some kind of activity or movement in the action based variety. You cannot see any kind of performance in the action less type; the sentence will be static in nature giving information about the subject, that's all. Study the following sentences:

1. Peter is my friend. We are students of this Institute. I am your teacher.

In the sentences at (a), do you find anything moving? No. The sentences merely describe Peter, We and I, which constitute the Subject of the sentence. The words “am”, ”is” and .”are” are doing two jobs simultaneously, that of an auxiliary and verb. So, we may name them as, “Auxiliary cum verbs” or in short A.V and pronounced as A dot V. . All the sentences at (a) are in Present tense, which is the first action less tense.

The second action less tense uses the A.Vs, “was:” and “were” and is named Past tense. Here are some sample sentences:

(b) John was my class mate last year. My parents were in London last month. You cannot see any movements in these and are merely informative above the subjects but in the past time period.

Every English sentence will have a grammar part and a meaning part. The grammar part will have only 3 elements, viz, Subject + Auxiliary + Verb (S + A + V). In all the action based tenses/sentences, you will find A +V as two distinct words as shown in the . following sentences:

(c) John and his sister are playing a game of chess. I am writing a letter now.

Jane is running to catch her school bus.

Every verb, printed in bold, shows an action such as "playing", "writing" and "running". Next, each of these verbs has a supporting auxiliary. The words AM, IS, ARE which were playing a dual role in Present tense, do only the supporting job in these sentences. This tense is to be known as “Simple present” and is quite distinct from "Present tense".

Whereas, in action less tense/sentence, the auxiliary and verb appear as a combined word. There are only 5 such A.Vs which are, AM,IS,ARE, WAS and WERE.

There are some interesting features about the action based type of sentences. Consider the following sentence:

Paul does not remember all the multiplication tables.

The meaning is very simple. Can you identify the S,A,V elements? Here they are:

Paul does not remember / all the multiplication tables.

S Neg. A V Meaning part (Object/Complement)

'Remember or remembering' is the activity here. It's an action based verb Who is performing this activity? Paul certainly, isn't he and Paul is the Subject? So, what is Paul or Subject? Subject is a Noun (of a person or thing only) and is the “Doer” of the action of remembering. We can now say that the meaning part or the

'Object/Complement' will contain the details of the activity of "remembering.".

In this sentence, there is only one activity. Paul could do more than one activity, one after another, couldn't he? How do we show the subsequent activity or activities? By using “infinitive verb” in the O/C part like this,

Paul doesn't remember / all the multiplication tables to solve all arithmetic

problems and to get pass marks.

The second activity is "solving". The third activity is "getting". So, the Subject can perform any number of activities one after the other.

Now, we come to the question, what exactly is the meaning of Subject in an action less sentence. Consider the next sentence:

Paul is / a weak student.

S A.V O/C

Since there is no activity in this sentence, what is Paul? He is the main character and nothing more. Do you also see that "Paul" and "a weak student" are one and the same person? "A weak student " is additional information about Paul. Therefore, we need to name these words as "Adjunct"

Paul is a weak student

S A.V Adjunct

By Andrew Stern - Thu Oct 30, 9:20 am ET

CHICAGO (Reuters) - Higher education has been a growth industry in the United States, evidenced by swelling enrollments, expanding campuses and growing endowments. But the global economic crisis has caught colleges and universities in a vice.

I wonder what kind of vice, numbers, prostitution, or did he really mean vise?

"The state of Arizona cut its contribution to the state university system by 4 percent this year and 5 percent next year -- with another mid-year cut possible, Its more than 118,000 university students may have to absorb a tuition hike next year of 10 percent or more."

Note the section, "possible, Its". Either the punctuation should be a period rather than a comma or the letter "I" should not be capitalized.

"It's not going to be as drastic as what corporations are doing," Watts said. "You don't just eliminate people and lay off faculty and expect not to destroy your academic program."

This article has lots of food for thought in other areas. What if you lay off faculty drones who aren't actively teaching? In case you don't know what that is a drone is a honey bee that does no useful work. Maybe the terrorists of the sixties who hold positions far beyond their academic credentials and contribute little value to the university should be the first to go. I agree you don't destroy your academic program but there is fat in every budget and excess in every faculty. You cut fat, not muscle and bone. And you cut all of the fat.

What if academia has to do what businesses do when things get tough? They get lean and mean. The grossly expensive "branch campus on every corner" mentality may have to go as will some day the "branch bank on every corner" mentality in banking. Remember when oil companies were putting a gas station on every corner. Today many of those buildings have other uses or they became victims of the wrecking ball. The "everything to everyone" mentality may have to go. Supporting terrorism to be multi-cultural may have to go. Wouldn't that be refreshing? Keeping kook professors who are tenured but only marginally utilized because what they teach really isn't in demand in the workplace may have to end. Wouldn't that be a hoot? Promoting the kinky in the name of diversity may have to go. Wouldn't that be an overall improvement? Maybe universities need to get back to the core business which is not catering to the weird but actually teaching someone something. And apparently the institution that Andrew Stern attended missed a couple of points about the English language.

In Andrew's defense, his article is better than most. Reuters generally is better than most. If you want to learn how not to write, check their competition.

There are around two million people living in Irian Jaya. Most of the central population are original Papuans (Papua New Guinea people), while in the outer region, near the sea also has an enormous number of people who have come from Malaysia. People on Irian Jaya are plainly different from the remaining of Indonesia, with black skin and curly hair. The first outsiders maybe came from the west around 60,000 years ago.

Economy

Irian Jaya is the lowest developed area in Indonesia, a big chance of the people that are occupied with agriculture, fishing and hunting. Mining, fishing, timber, gas and oil are important to major industries. Irian Jaya is the only hugest deposit of copper on the earth.

Geography

Irian Jaya, which uses 22% of Indonesia's total land region, expands over the left half of New Guinea. Puncak Jaya is the highest mountain in Irian Jaya. It's said to be around 5,050 metres high. There are many other mountains in Irian Jaya.

Industry

Gold and copper mining is the centre for Irian Jaya. Oil and gas is the most important thing for Indonesia because there are millions of people and the consumption they use.

Religion

The main religion in Irian Jaya is Christianity including some traditional beliefs. Around the coastal areas Islam is a growing religion.

Language

Irian Jaya language is mainly English and Bahasa Indonesia.

Fauna and Flora

Papua Island may have the richest wildlife and concentration of plant life in all of Indonesia or maybe the world. The area is also home of 150 species of lizards, 30,000 species of beetles, 200 frogs and 800 spiders. A high percentage of the island's snake species are poisonous.

There should be a fan club to immaterialize this wonderful woman who has given us so much grammatical pleasure. There may even be case for making malapropisms convulsory. Don't you think the world would be a brighter place if we all spoke in the same fashion is the interminable Mrs Malaprop? We could have a Malaprop community with honorable membership. As far as I'm construed, a Malaprop fan club would be a roving success.

I'm not sure that everyone will support me in this but hope springs nocturnal. I guess the best place to start if we want to rasie the profile of Mrs Malaprop is with our own relatives. Remember: Chastity begins at home! We might have to ease our family into the world of malapropisms rather gently at first but as they say, direction is the better part of valor. You may of course have to be prepared for some opposition in your attempts to introduce Mrs Malaprop to your family members keeping in mind that familiarity breeds content. It might just be case of least said soonest tended.

The key is to avoid forcing others to accept Malapropisms as part of their everyday language remembering that the road to hell is paved with good inventions. We have to remind ourselves of how much we help people by encouraging the use of Malapropisms. Ultimately, the end villifies the means. We should never feel apopleptic about introducing the wonderful world of Mrs Malaprop to our friends and family.

Some people might accuse me of butchering the English language by endorsing Malapropisms. To that charge I would answer, in much the same way as Mrs Malaprop would: I RESEMBLE THAT REMARK!!

PS. How many Malapropisms did you find in this article??

Before tackling the differences between Attain and Obtain, a basic review of verbs, in general may be helpful.

Verbs are words that represent an action - or a state of being - of the subject, e.g., I am writing an article, (“writing” is the action verb); God exists in many of us, (“exists” is the state of being verb.)

Transitive verbs express an action, which is carried from the subject to the object, to complete the meaning of a statement, e. g., he will attain a diploma. (Diploma is the object and is the goal of the action.)

Intransitive verbs express an action - or state - that is limited to the subject, or, in other words, an action which does NOT require an object to complete the meaning of a statement, e. g., the bird flies; the dog runs (expresses action); he sleeps too much (expresses a state).

Test your knowledge of the correct usage of these verbs (before continuing):

Which verb (attain, obtain) should be used in the following sentences, and are they transitive or intransitive?

1. A love that no longer _______ should be forgotten
2. Hopefully, my article will ______ its purpose

Now, let's look at the verbs Attain and Obtain. Just as anything is learned, you will need to think and use the examples that I have provided. Be patient and continue trying to come up with your own sentences using these verbs. Study the rules that apply.

ATTAIN

1A. Most commonly used as a transitive verb (with an object). To reach an end or objective by some effort (attain a goal):

THINK: GAIN, ACHIEVE

His latest speech attained (gained, achieved) its goal as the best. (The direct object is “goal”.)

1B. To come into possession of, or arrived at by persistence or passage of time.

THINK: REACH

He attained (reached) happiness over time (by passage of time).

2. Used as an intransitive verb (usually followed by to or unto). To come to

the end of a progression or course of movement.

God's love will attain unto the end of time; He will

attain to a ripe old age if he eats right.

RULE OF THUMB: Attain always implies an effort,motion or progression toward something and is not synonymous with obtain.

OBTAIN

1. Most commonly used as a transitive verb (with an object), generally implies that there is effort or desire in the getting of something.

Think: to get, find, acquire, incur or procure

I obtained (got, acquired, incurred) a headache trying to explain the difference between these verbs.

He obtained (acquired, found) happiness in love (by desire).

2. Used as an intransitive verb (without an object), implies something to be customary, in vogue, prevailing, established, accepted or prevalent.

Using the intransitive verb seems to be the most troubling for some.

Think of: exists

God's law obtains (exists, prevails) as the law of the land.

Following the crowd obtains (exists, is customary) as the only way uninformed voters back a candidate.

RULE OF THUMB: Obtain does NOT necessarily imply effort, motion or progression, which attain does.

How did you do with the two test questions?

Question 1

If you answered obtain and intransitive, you were correct.

A love that no longer obtains should be forgotten.

(In this case, love is a "state of mind" that no longer exists; there is no

object.)

Question 2

If you answered attain and transitive, you were correct.

Hopefully, my article will attain its purpose.

(In this case, an effort is made, which is carried to the object.)

Note: Several dictionaries and other sources were visited to compare and/or confirm my work.

Well, that's one argument, but there's another camp that holds the opposite view. Some language experts believe that the new tools in technology facilitate writing and encourage young people to write more frequently, In short, high-tech gadgets like computers and smart phones and notebooks tend to make writing more pleasurable and it allows for more practice.

Although one can argue against or for both of these arguments, many observers say that language needed to be reassessed when the printing press was introduced. Prior to printing, all writing was done by hand, and stories of morality and culture were passed on from one generation to another in an oral medium. The printing press changed all that. In terms of religious thinking, Johannes Guttenberg, the inventor of movable type printing (circa 1439), changed the face of Christianity with the release of the Gutenberg Bible.

In the same fashion, the computer has been a wonderful tool for writers all over the world to publish and get their work out as quickly as possible. And the convenience of laptops and notebooks are especially noteworthy, making them ideal tools for writing. Additionally, software like Windows Word helps to check spelling and grammar; everything considered, it's a great time to be a writer. And you don't have to worry about stuff like the Spanish Inquisition to censor your work!

As far as texting messages and writing short form goes, there might be some misspellings and grammar errors in SMS messages, but the creativity of it all is still quite remarkable - not to mention the speed at which these messages are sent to virtually every part of the world.

There are also stories that one hears like the one of Westlake School District in Ohio, which found that literacy skills among school kids improve when they blog. That's really a heart-warming discovery of the times that we are living in and it reveals several aspects of modern life that still have an element of hope.

On the one hand, we are quite bewildered at the thought of letting our children loose on the Net. And conversely, we also feel that they might be left behind as writers and thinkers if they do not possess the kind of skills that social networking and blogging requires them to have. How ironic? It's as Charles Dickens said, "It's the best of times, and the worst of times."

Nonetheless, this is an age of writing, maybe not like Shakespeare or Voltaire, but the number of blogs and online news articles goes to show that there is still a huge readership online. And that is indeed encouraging. For writing is just a medium of expression just as painting. And one can express the same emotions, and feelings via the Internet, just as one would write a book.

So, does technology really kill.....the written word? Absolutely not. No matter how much technology there is, each person has a craving to read and to know. Curiosity has always been man's forte'. Whether one uses a notebook in the traditional sense or an Apple notebook, it really doesn't matter.

This is the season of religious retreat in India during the Monsoon. It is a time when people pray and devote their time to religious studies. There is also a vegetarian diet that plays a role in clearing out toxins from the body and improving the spiritual self. Recently, a news paper article said that the Ramayana, which is similar to the Bible in the Hindu religion,  can be made available to you in the form of an SMS on you mobile phone, during this season of prayer and reflection. And I thought that was wonderful - what better example of technology aiding ancient literary works to survive and thrive. That kind of advertising speaks for itself.

 "In the beginning was the word." - The Bible.